Way Behind the Times

I’m way behind the times!  I was comfortable when things moved slowly. When I received a bill, I sat down and wrote a check, sent it through the mail and recorded it in my check book.  Easy, logical, neat!  I still pay my bills by writing checks. My friends make fun of me!  But it is comforting for me to see my ledger and I can check my math to see how much money I had left in my account! I felt like an adult!  Today things are moving too fast!  I remember making a collect call to myself when I would return to college after a weekend at home.  Mom would answer and the operator would say she had a collect call for me and my mom would say I wasn’t there but then she knew I was back safely.  Simple, clean, easy!

Today, everything moves so fast!  Phones and computers speed up life.  Shopping can be done 24 hours a day without leaving your house.  I have been very unsuccessful shopping on line. Either my credit card company has no record of the purchase or I never receive the product!! 

Today, and recently I reached my boiling point.  I purchased plants  from my nursery and when I went to check out, their credit card machine was on the fritz and would only take a tap card!  Having no idea what that was, she looked through my credit cards and found one that had 3 curved lines, placed it on the machine and the purchase went through! I’m turning 80 in a month and a half, and wish the world would slow down!  I realize that will not happen so I better get with it or I will be out of touch with life today!

After talking with Wally and Henry, they convince me that if I don’t change my thinking I will fall behind. I’m not exactly sure how to change my thinking. I have to be open to new approaches to life, get people to help when my 80 year old brain doesn’t work the way it used to. I can use my kids as advisors and seniors like Wally and Henry as well. Wally spent an afternoon with me on my computer just trying to navigate through a new program they use regularly. And I guess I have to quit with the techno jokes that I often fall back on to hide my computer illiteracy! I owe it to myself to give it a try!

Getting With It – One Step at a Time

George writes about a topic that continues to challenge him. Indeed, last year he reflected on his ongoing battles with our ever-changing technology and his yearning for a slower, simpler time. In addition to reinforcing his belief that earlier times were better and easier to navigate, he—and the rest of us seniors—must also reckon with changes that are occurring at a pace far greater than ever before. We simply don’t have the same amount of time to learn, practice, and master something before it’s outdated or replaced with a newer, smarter, and faster version.

While many of us recognize that technology has the potential to empower older adults, it can also feel overwhelming. Innovations such as telehealth, smart home sensors, wearable devices, video calls, and digital platforms allow seniors to remain in their homes longer, stay connected with family and friends, reduce isolation, and keep their minds active. Even so, I can still understand why throwing in the towel may sometimes seem like the only practical solution rather than struggling to learn yet another device or application.

However, it doesn’t have to be a win-or-lose dilemma. George still has the freedom to write checks and balance his checkbook—for now. When he encounters a payee who requires electronic payment, then he’ll need to seek the help necessary to learn that one skill. In the meantime, he can continue to enjoy a slower, simpler, and more comfortable life by relying on the habits and routines he has developed over the years.

If online shopping presents too many obstacles or raises concerns about technology-related scams, he still has the time and ability to shop in person and pay with cash or a check. If he eventually finds that he must rely on the internet to make a purchase, he can seek out someone—or a trusted resource—to help him navigate the process safely.

As he says in his post, “I better get with it or I will be out of touch with life today!” I would suggest that the life he prefers is still available to him for most of what he does, most of the time. When he encounters an obstacle, he can simply “get with it” for that particular situation. It doesn’t mean he has to become a computer expert or learn every feature his phone offers. It simply means learning what he needs, when he needs it.

“Technology is anything that wasn’t around when you were born.”

– Alan Kay

Left Behind

We three old guys routinely discuss George’s struggle in accepting some aspects of today’s technologic life. He’s not wrong about the clock speed of our reality: everything seems faster. With the right ‘magic’, financial transactions, acquisitions, and communication are almost instantaneous – but you need to be comfortable with magic wands —  like a card you can tap on a point-of-sale terminal! Amazing, right? (Okay, I’m being sarcastic).

It’s hard for me to understand why that act seems so difficult for Geo. Do it once and it’s a learned behavior. Individuals with less competence complete this task every day. So, what’s the problem?

I suspect it is the number of innovations that seem to materialize each week – or changing procedures that are constantly revised. It’s an issue of mass. If you don’t keep up, you find yourself multiple revisions behind. It’s a world where if you want a paper invoice for your cable bill, that will be an extra $5 please, but if you pay for a meal with a credit card, another 4% is tacked on. These are not the rules we old guys grew up with. There’s an element of ‘proactive inhibition’ – the conflict of previously learned behavior competing with new protocols. We older folks have many more scripts to work through, before we learn new methods. Taken collectively, it’s an obstacle, but it is not overwhelming.

Hen is dead right: pick your core areas. You don’t have to learn every new app. So, what if you like to use Meta, but everyone else is on TikTok. You don’t have to peruse subreddits; you don’t need to be an early adopter. However, you do need to choose the areas where it is essential to keep up – or get someone to do it for you. My tennis club now only accepts Venmo… if I want to play, I’d better know how to use it.

And there it is: keep up or be left behind.  That’s the fear that Geo calls out at the end of his post. It’s a commonly held fear: one of the greatest anxieties seniors express is to become irrelevant – to be left behind. Weirdly, that fear can incent folks to hold on to proficiencies that were highly regarded several train-stops ago, but are no longer on track. My advice: keep writing checks, Geo, but add other skills to the portfolio.